You may not have chosen to be a carer – you may have drifted into it or realised that no-one else was going to do it. You may have done it willingly but not realised how tough it would get. You may start to regret it, feel trapped, even resentful. If it’s truly not for you then you have to ask yourself whether your cared for would be better off in a care or nursing home and you visiting rather than you taking care of them but resenting the impact it’s having on you, your financial situation, your life.
If you’re OK being a carer you may nonetheless feel isolated from the outside world, from your friends, from your former work or profession. You may start to feel like a non-person because none of the people involved with the care of your cared for seems to even recognise that you’re a human being let alone gives a stuff about you. You may even start to worry about your memory functions.
When I participated in a Looking after me course the things that the participants were all saying were:
- I feel isolated
- No-one seems to care that I’m trying to cope on my own
- I never get out of the house other than to go grocery shopping
- Social services treat me like the receptionist – always available to answer the phone, to fill in forms
These are some of the possible remedies to keep your brain sharp:
- belong to carers groups in your area
- interact with friends on the phone or by Skype
- belong to forums for carers/caregivers
- depending on your profession try to get online teaching gigs
- again depending on your profession, build an online business where you can coach/mentor people (and make money at the same time)
- participate in Google Hangouts on topics of interest to you
- do crosswords, Suduko
- learn a language – there are some great online options now for example Duolingo which is free and Babbel which is paid for but very inexpensive
To relax you could try some of the following:
- do some crafts – .e.g. felting, knitting (I ended up knitting and making nuno wraps which when mum was in a nrusing home resulted in me doing craft fairs to sell them ! www.GilliasCrafts.com)
- participate in Google Hangouts on topics of interest to you
- do crosswords, Suduko
- learn a language – online options I would recommend are Duolingo which is free and Babbel which is paid for but very inexpensive